From: Dennis Perman DC, for The Masters Free weekly e-mail newsletter (Masters9@aol.com) Dr. Eric Goldman, who practices in Pomona, NY with his wonderful significant other, Dr. Arlene Kahn, is one of the nicest, kindest, most caring doctors I know. In fact, his sensitivity and genuine concern for people at times interfered with running his practice effectively. Not wanting to impose on others, he was not communicating directly enough with his patients to enforce his policies, and that hurt his patient compliance. A student of Capacity Technology, Eric knew that identifying weaker areas and building resources to handle them was the way to improve himself and his practice. He decided to develop his confidence, assertiveness and confrontational tolerance. Often, when you're working on something, you quickly attract opportunities to display your progress, and of course, this is what happened to Eric. A new patient came in, a former patient of another chiropractor in town, and from the first, started dictating terms -- "I don't need X-rays, I only need once a week, you'll take my insurance as full payment, won't you," and all the other stuff he'd heard a million times. Only this time, Eric responded differently. "Mr. Patient, you left the other doctor's office because you weren't getting good results. Do you want to get good results here?" The patient nodded, and Eric continued, "I have a responsibility to tell you the truth about your condition and the program of care you need. What you decide to do is up to you, but if you're going to be a patient here, you're going to have to do what I know is best for you. I would rather not have you as a patient than fail to give you the excellent care you deserve. Do I have your commitment?" Now, at this point, I would have given anything to be a fly on the wall, just to see who was more surprised at this exchange, the patient or the doctor. By standing up for what he knew was right, Eric defined the boundaries that were acceptable in his office, something more chiropractors should be willing to do. Second, he didn't make the patient wrong, but overcame fear so he could exert the necessary influence to reclaim his authority. After all, the doctor usually knows much more about the appropriate course of action -- if not, why is the patient seeking an expert opinion? Well, the patient did agree to follow through on Eric's recommendations, and about four weeks later, they had another conversation that went something like this. "Dr. Goldman, I want to thank you for making me follow your advice. I'm getting great results under your care, results I never got before. Thanks for being my chiropractor, and for caring enough to hold me to a higher standard than I held myself." How ironic! Caring about someone isn't always about making it easy for them to get their way. Sometimes, the best way to care for someone is to tell them the truth, and gently but firmly hold them to a higher standard. It's better for them, better for you, and better for the common good, too. Dennis Perman DC, for The Masters